Sanctuary
by WarriorInMyself
Summary: Ever since Kikyo died nothing has been the same. He won't talk to me anymore; won't even look at me without cringing away. As if I have a disease. I know all he sees is her when he looks at me. I know he doesn't see me anymore. In KAG POV.


Disclaimer: I don't own inuyasha I just used the characters. Nor do I own sanctuary by utada hikaru

Note: this is kag. Pov …

p.s. I recommend you listen to the song as you read this story it is actually quite good together.

Sanctuary

Ever since Kikyo died nothing has been the same. He won't talk to me anymore; won't even look at me without cringing away. As if I have a disease. I know all he sees is her when he looks at me. I know he doesn't see me anymore. That doesn't me it doesn't hurt me. I have tried to think positive about the situation. But I can't… there is no positive. And while everyone looks at me with pitying looks all I do is put on that fake smile like everything is okay.

Well I can't take anymore. He talks in his sleep about her. He won't even eat what I make him. He just hunts his own food but gives it to Shippo. He has lost weight and I am so scared for him. I am so tired and hurt and I just want to help Inuyasha. That's all I have ever wanted was for him to love me and I can make him happy but it's no use. He won't let me…

One day while we were camping I couldn't stand Inuyasha not looking at me anymore so I fled to an open field. I wasn't surprised that no one noticed me, especially Inuyasha but I just wish he did, you know?

So I just sat in that field and sang. I couldn't cry anymore. What reason was there to when my tears have dried up? So I sang, and sang I did; to my hearts content.

_*I need more affection than you know*_

_In you and I _

_There's a new land_

_Angels in flight _

_*I need more affection than you know*_

_My sanctuary, my sanctuary _

_Where fears and lies melt away …_

_Music in time _

_*I need more affection than you know*_

_What's left of me_

_What's left of me ,now?_

It's funny how things change because as soon as I start the second verse _he _comes. Inuyasha walks into the field**. **_**So now he comes to find me**_ I think. But he doesn't say anything he just stares. And I turn to him and gaze at him. He looks like he wants to say something but I refuse to stop singing. I want him to hear this.

_I watch you, fast asleep…_

_All I fear, means nothing_

And they don't. Ever since she died well… again, everything I felt… my fear s and worries they have meant nothing to him. To anyone… really. He used to watch over us before he went to sleep . Now he is the first to sleep and last to rise. Now it is as if I watch over him and I never sleep because he is always restless and I am scared he will run if I close my eyes. But I just want him to see…

_In you and I,_

_There's a new land _

_Angels in flight_

_*I need more affection than you know*_

_My sanctuary, my sanctuary_

I just want him to see that I love him and that I want him to be happy. I want to_ be_ with him and see his smirks, hears his voice, I want him to have someone to go to when he has troubles. I want to be his SANCTUARY. I want to be his guardian angel. And I want him to know that I need him. If no one else does, I do. I need Inuyasha the half-demon… I fell in love with. The man I met with an arrow in his chest. The man that kept calling me "you" when we first met. I need him and I want his love. I want him to accept me.

_Where fears and lies, melt away…_

_Music in time _

_*I need more affection than you know*_

_what's left of me _

_what's left of me._

_*So many ups and downs*_

I smile at 's all we ever had Inuyasha and I. ups and downs. Nothing was ever right between us. We got in fights, I got kidnapped, our time was just chaotic. And while I sing he still stares at me but he has yet to leave. I saw an inkling of emotion when I said ups and downs. _**so there is something there after all**__._ He is actually listening to me. To_ my_ voice.

_My heart's a battleground_

_*I need true emotions*_

I need the old Inuyasha back. The smart mouthed, kind, strong, _hot_, dog-earred man I love. I don't want this emotionless man in front of me until we beat Naraku. I couldn't bare it. And I know he is in there, I just need to help bring him back.

_*I need more affection than you know*_

_*I need true emotions*_

_**I need you Inuyasha. Where has the real you gone?**_ I think. _**Come back to me…**_

_You show me, how to see_

_That nothing, is whole _

_Nothing… is broken_

As I am about to say the chorus again he stops me. _He talks _to me for the first time in a long time.

" You can't say nothing is broken…" he says so softy looking at the ground.

I stop singing and say "what?"

" You can't say nothing is broken!" he shouts " I _am _ broken Kagome! She is gone, dead, nothing anymore! And it's my fault I couldn't protect her. I couldn't get to her in time…"

He rambles on and on about what he should have done. What he didn't do and I am so tired of him feeling sorry for himself.

"OH SHUT UP!" I scream.

He shuts up and stares at me as if ive grown 3 more heads. But I ignore the stare and keep on talking.

"Please spare me the guilt trip Inuyasha you have been on it for way to long and it needs to end. Stop acting like this is all about you. _She was a part of my soul Inuyahsa. I was her reincarnation!_ Dammit! You may have lost your first love but I lost a part of my soul. She was me Inuyasha. She trusted me because I was her. And you know what? I tried to save her but it didn't work out that well and she is gone. i can't turn back time! If I could change what happened I would've. Don't you know that! I tried to save her and you. But after she died all yu do is flinch at me when you catch my eye. Do you know how that makes me feel? Do you? Hell no you don't. I know I let both of you down. I know I look like her! But if you opened up to me we could solve this together. We could…."

I just ramble all of my emotions together. Some of the things I say are not even coherent to the other but I don't care. I will get this off my chest. So I start to sing again.

_In you and I _

_There's a new land _

_Angels in flight_

_*I need more affection than you know*_

_My sanctuary, my sanctuary_

_Where fears and lies, melt away…_

_Music in time _

_*I need more affection than you know*_

_what's left of me _

_what's left of me,_

_Now_

I look at him and all I am thinking is clear on my face. I am being so open with him. Letting him see me vulnerable. But I want him to know how I feel I want him to know that I am here with open arms and that we could be together if he'd just open up to me and let me help him. Because I want to be his Sanctuary…his place of comfort and rest. Just like he is mine.

_My fears _

_My Lies _

_Melt away…_

_*I need more affection than you know*_

when I finally finish the song I am at peace with myself and I look at Inuyasha. He looks at me and finally for the first time in so long, runs to me and embraces me. He holds me….he is holding me right now at this second.

"I love you" I say because I need to say these words and even though they can never truly express how much I feel about Inuyasha they are the best word available. "I LOVE YOU!" I say louder.

Inuyasha smiles and looks down at me " Me too. I love_ you _Kagome. And I am sorry about these past few months. Of me ignoring you and Kikyo dying and…" I silence him by putting my finger over his mouth, smile, and say

"Just shut up and kiss me" and he does because we both know through thick and thin that we will both be each others Sanctuary.


End file.
